I have seen a new sort of advert on the Internet. They are somewhat less intrusive, though they still annoy me. My last sighting of them was here, which is also a pretty funny article.

Basically, what you have is what appears to be a rather thin text box, but is in reality a full-sized banner ad, with a transparent top part. When you roll your mouse pointer over it, a menu pops up, similar to what would happen if you were to right-click your mouse pointer. It contains a simple list of things related to that text box; for example, I am looking at one now that says "Visit personal injury sites!" I roll my mouse over it, and up pops a menu reading:

Select a Site Below!
AGGRESSIVE and EXPERIENCED TEXAS LAWYER
Injury Lawyer Network
Weitz amp; Luxenberg
Personal Injury Lawyer

The "Select a Site Below" link does nothing when clicked on, though if you click on it fast enough, the menu disappears. As the same effect can be reached by clicking anywhere on the page that is not the menu, this selection is useless and can only serve to confuse people.

AGGRESSIVE and EXPERIENCED TEXAS LAWYER

It's in all caps. This means that someone is yelling at me. I don't like being yelled at, and I'd wager that most everyone else in the world doesn't like being yelled at either. I wouldn't click here. Never mind the fact that he is from Texas, and whoever you are suing would probably get the death penalty.

Injury Lawyer Network

This one sounds nice. Nice and professional, which is just how I like my lawyers. It sounds fairly modern; the inclusion of the word "network" into practically anything makes it sound modern and nice and professional. Watch: Transvestite Goat-Loving Midget Network. There's not just one transvestite goat-loving midget working here, there's a team. A team can do teamwork, and can multitask more proactively in a forward-thinking, outside-the-box type manner.

Weitz amp; Luxenberg

I'm going to assume that what they meant that thing in the middle to be is &. But they screwed it up. If these guys hired the best folks they could find to write that simple little bit, then I'm not going to deal with them.

Personal Injury Lawyer

This is just someone's title. Not too impressive. It's far too vague for me to make any real decision about him.

In summary, I wouldn't click on any of those, because I could just walk over, grab the telephone book, and look up local lawyers to do the work instead.